Go Where the Peace is

Life is full of beauty-

Harvesting gorgeous vegetables from my garden

Spending time with my amazing grandkids.

Girls night at the movies with my family tribe of women

Curling up with blankets on the couch to watch a weekend mystery with my teen daughter, while sipping our bottled rootbeers.

Delicious morning hugs from my still-sleepy husband

Peaceful, contemplative Sundays

Meaningful time with great friends

Farm animals happy to see me every morning

Gentle, quiet companionship from a sweet dog

I love peace. I love kindness and generosity and wholesomeness.

I do not like turmoil.

Recently, I got verbally spanked by someone over an accidental misunderstanding.

It was harsh and not expected.  I cried later.

I love this person.

I've always respected her boundaries.

I've done my best to show kindness and be if not a great, then certainly a decent friend.

I'm very much an introvert, so I never feel that I'm a great friend or neighbor.  (I require too much alone time.)  However,  I try to practice what I preach to my kids- to be smiling and cheerful in the company of others, to be sincerely gracious and say 'thank you' as often as I can, and to apologize immediately if I'm ever aware that I hurt someone- even unintentionally. 

 I'm also definitely a little too huggy, at times.  Working on that.

I was really concerned that this person was so upset and tried my best to smooth things over, to make ammends and help her realize it was a misunderstanding.

My sincerest apologies seemed to only fall on deaf ears.

What do you do when you feel completely rebuked?

When your attempts at kindness go unappreciated and it seems no amount of authenticity or friendliness is enough?

It's often difficult for me to navigate this world in which we live.

I believe in being courteous, giving people the benefit of the doubt and treating others the way I'd want to be treated. (Which is, kindly.) I love people, am fascinated by their stories and wish everyone the best.

It is a rare thing for me to not like someone and if that happens, I try really hard to find something to like about them.

I believe there is enough for everyone in this world to find their level of contentment. (And that perhaps contentment, often, comes from unexpected sources or requires less than we think.)

I know that every single person is dealing with some degree of pain or doubt, sorrow or suffering. Fighting their own battles.

I truly wish them only health, happiness and peace.

I never wish to add more weight upon their shoulders. (Although, I'm sure I've been guilty of this.)

However, this misunderstanding I experienced later caused me to feel anger.

Anger over being treated so severely and having my friendliness swept aside as if it has meant nothing.

The fact is, the older I get, the more I want to call people out on their rudeness!

Their unfairness and crankiness.

Their forgetfulness of the generosity others have shown them,

Their pickiness or disregard for the work other's have put into something.

Their gossiping and trying to tear people down,

Always trying to 'one-up' others.

Weighing others down with their complaints.

Not allowing others to happily live their own lives.

Plain ol' drama. Because apparently, life is boring unless they're scrutinizing everyone else,  sensationalizing relationships or magnifying someone's faults.

I begin to think that at my age, having experienced and observed much, I have the right to call it like it is- to put them in their place if needed.

To be rude right back; which goes against every courteous skill I've honed in my lifetime.

And BOY, do I want to at times. I really, really do.

But here's the thing: I'm sure at some point in my life, someone- somewhere, has probably thought they could accuse me of things on that same list. Either because of some action or omission...or simply because they assumed something about me that wasn't true.

Pointing fingers and calling people out is a slippery slope.

After contemplating my experience and feeling reasonable once more,

I began to think on my course of action.

Here is what I know to be true.

More LOVE never hurts.

More LOVE can heal.

More LOVE, when given freely, forgives.

Family, friends, neighbors, strangers....I am free when I show forth an increase in love to my fellow human beings.

Because being a human is hard for us all sometimes.

So I will continue to love her and treat her the way I'd want to be treated... and do so free of any expectations.

And there it is- my peace is back.

Encouragement and Fortitude

Vess Barnes wrote that the purpose of life is,

"To encourage, to comfort, to awaken, and to stretch those who find themselves riding this big ball as it screams thru time in the silence of space. To be a bridge, not a barricade. To be a link, not a lapse. To be a beacon and a bolster; not a bragger or a bummer. To help bring the corners of life's lips to their summit. To be a friend to those who find their fit a little awkward in this chaos society calls living."    ~From How Heroes Endure Hard Times

I have done many difficult things in my life- things I never anticipated and would most likely have shrunk from if I'd known before hand just how hard they would be.   But, this is life!  It's not always smooth sailing- we grow by leaps and bounds when we meet challenges and either plod, plow or sashay through them.   My life's challenges may pale in comparison to another's, but they are tailor-made for me.
Looking back over the hills, mountains and valleys of the past, you see a beautiful pattern- a tapestry being woven.  One hopefully, of love and fortitude, graciousness and growth, forgiveness and strength.
I believe everyone has greatness within them.  We all have courage and kindness.  We can use our gifts to encourage and uplift,

en·cour·age

give support, confidence, or hope to (someone).

synonyms: hearten, cheer, buoy up, inspire, motivate, invigorate, embolden, fortify

 to give peace to those who are fearful,

 peace 

 Freedom from quarrels and disagreement; harmonious relations

 Inner contentment; serenity: peace of mind.

 In a state of tranquillity; serene: 

 Free from strife: 

---

and to comfort those in need.

com·fort  

 To soothe in time of affliction or distress.

 To ease physically; relieve.

 A condition or feeling of pleasurable ease, well-being, and contentment.

 Solace in time of grief or fear.

Help; assistance

 One that brings or provides comfort.

 The capacity to give physical ease and well-being:

Forgetting about yourself and focusing on others or greater purposes can bolster the soul in difficult times.  A wonderful article to read is: How Heroes Endure Hard Times by Stephen Palmer.  I highly recommend it.  You can find it HERE.